Following the plan.

A brisk walk today. Single digit temperatures energize Bruno and that means much of the walk is actually a canter for him. The faster pace keeps him warm. Still, his ears flap in the wind he creates and I worry about frostbite. He just doesn’t seem to notice. We made it short walk – the Ravinia route – but the cold tires him out. I have a sleeping pooch at my feet as I write. Correction – a snoring pooch. Ah, the sound of contentment.

Still no word from the local opportunity that I interviewed with in early November. I find it disappointment when a company promises to contact you by a certain date “because we don’t want to keep people hanging,” and then doesn’t follow through. It’s troublesome for me being that I am so very customer-centric. I realize that this is an employer’s market but you still need to follow whatever plan you’ve put into place. Otherwise, I have to wonder how good you are at serving your paying customer. Yet, that means you really NEED ME! Hahaha! I’ve just amused myself with that logic.

I did get contacted by the State of Wisconsin for an interview. Get this…I took the exam for an Unemployment Benefits Specialist 1 back in June, did rather well, and now I’m being interviewed (not until January 5) for one of four positions (two permanent, two temp) that are available in Appleton. Boy, do I have experience on this subject! I’ve had to call several times with questions and I feel pretty confident about being able to handle what they call, controversial situations. I know that I’ve probably been one of the nicer callers they get in the course of a day but I go out of my way to be nice to them. For the number of calls each person takes from people in sad, awful situations, I’m sure that the specialists get blasted on a regular basis. Lots of people need to vent. I hope that the conversation they have with me is pleasant and feels like a bit of a break. And now, I have the potential of being one of them. You know, it’s a great fit. Knowing exactly how the caller feels and understanding that not everyone goes at their situation with a positive attitude comes naturally to me. The bad thing is that it’s pretty low pay but we’d be able to make it. I’d be able to stay in my house, pay all my bills, and have great benefits. At some point I’d also have the inside track for other positions or have the opportunity to be promoted. See…positive attitude.

Doc and I continue to follow our plan. I'm searching for whatever assistance for which we now qualify and I’m amazed at how much there is. I don’t know if funding is there, but I’m certainly willing to do the work filling out forms and waiting in line. I am so grateful for the programs that exist. Even if we can’t be funded, I’ve seen people in far off worse situations than we are and I feel for them. This month, if you can do it, please buy one of the pre-packaged sacks of food at your local grocery store for your food pantry, donate old towels, blankets, or cleaning supplies to your pet shelter, or pull an ornament from a merchant’s donation tree to buy a basic necessity for someone who doesn’t have shampoo, deodorant, or shaving cream. I have. It’s part of our plan.

What’s the right thing to do?

It finally snowed! Bruno loves the snow. He’s a completely different dog in the snow - full of energy, happy wagging tail, and that "puppiness" (I know, not a word) bounce that very young bassets have. We call him a “plow hound” because he thrusts his nose into the snow down to the ground and plows, snorting all the way. Sometimes the snow sticks to his snout and if it’s really cold, he gets little icicles. That’s gotta hurt but he doesn’t seem to mind. I never know if I should wipe him off or leave it alone.

Today we’re waiting for “the big one.” Doc just left for the grocery store to stock up. It sounds so funny but we’re preparing for a couple of days without an outing. Late this afternoon we’re headed off to Dottie’s for a bit of social time. Dottie is one of our retired neighbors and has become a close friend. We call visits to her home mini-mental health breaks. She loves many of the same things we do: opera, public radio, the symphony (Dottie plays the viola in the Fox Valley Symphony) and theater. We miss living near Chicago – we were members of the Lyric Opera and on our local Chapter board of directors, we attended Chicago Symphony performances, and we looked forward to programs at Ravinia. At least these visits with Dottie satisfy much of those needs. She’s a great neighbor who is trying to do the right things where we are concerned.

I have a question for all of you. My friend Dan has interviewed for a technical writer position with a great company that is growing at leaps and bounds. Lucky man! He followed up last week to get information about his status and was told by the hiring manager, not HR, that out of the group that they interviewed for the position, he was the only person who did not receive a rejection letter. OK, here’s where you go “Woo-Hoo!” right? Wrong. Dan was told “not to buy a new wardrobe just yet,” that they were going to continue searching for candidates. Apparently, if they can’t find someone with experience in a particular software package and an electrical engineering background, Dan might be the person they want. Talk about a blow that takes the wind out of you. When he told me the story, I felt so bad for him having to be on the roller coaster. Yippee! He’s not rejected! Dang! He’s not hired. So now what? What’s the right thing to do? Keep your hat in the ring and hope that being not quite the right person is good enough for you because you really need the job, or walk away because you don’t want to be second best and KNOW it? If I got an offer today, I would not know if I was the first, second or even third choice. I don’t want to know, ever. I want to go to my next employer with a full heart thinking and feeling that I am the best fit.

And here comes the snow.

Being caretaker.

Bruno is adapting to his diet rather well. Almost too well. He seems to be satisfied with his new food and the amount he gets. I wonder how long that will last. I just want to get this "fixed" before he notices.

Morning walks at 6:30AM are increasingly dark as we approach the winter solstice. But I don’t feel uneasy because of the hour and the amount of people out and about. Last Saturday, Bruno and I took the Grove and Lynch Roads route going past a favorite Christmas tree vendor. Bruno sniffed a few trees and I made sure that he had poor aim, if you get what I mean. It put the Christmas spirit into my head so later that morning, Doc and I returned to the tree lot to get our fresh Christmas tree. It's the only live tree in our house - there are usually 15 others that are artificial. The lot owners are great people and we’ve bought our tree from them before. This time, he asked how our year had been and we told them about being unemployed for the second Christmas in row but that we remained positive about the future. He asked what I did for a living and I shared my business card. Marketing. He said that marketing was what was probably needed for his two businesses but that right now he was having a tough times and couldn’t afford it. We picked out a tree and a couple of bundles of boughs and he said, “$25 for the tree; the boughs are free because you’re unemployed.” We argued that it was in our budget but he insisted. I’m going to go back next week to see what I can do to help him get more business without spending a lot of money, or any at all. He paid it forward and I'm sure there is something I can do for him. In fact, I have a couple of ideas already.

Yesterday was a day of taking care of others. Part of my morning was spent conducting a workshop teaching other unemployed professionals how to complete a good professional summary and then from it, writing a short bio. For most people, the hardest part of the process is identifying special skills. We’re taught as children to be humble and not to brag. It’s not a lack of confidence about what we can do because in any given situation, if someone has a particular strength for a needed task, they generally jump in and do it. But to talk about, in a bio or cover letter, can be very hard. I shared some of the dozen or so bios that I helped people create. I have their permission to share them and I’m glad for that – it shows that my workshop with them paid off. They feel the bio accurately reflects them and should be shared. My class yesterday knew some of these folks and they agreed about the accuracy of the bios. Now I’m eager to help this new class capture their strengths. I love that "Aha!" moment.

Later that afternoon, I took Doc to a doctor appointment. Sigh. A hernia that had been repaired 30 years ago is back. That means more surgery. Now is not a good time for a lot of reasons. Everyone agreed that he could wait until the week between Christmas and New Year’s Eve, except, of course, if an emergency occurs. He's already met his health insurance deductible (he has his own coverage, separate from mine) so at least our financial exposure is limited but it still means he has exposure to the risk of surgery. He’s had several abdominal surgeries in the last four years and I worry how this one will impact his digestive tract. We’ve adapted pretty well to his food issues and are thankful that we can “figure it out.” I wonder if this will change what food he can enjoy – we love food! We’ll see.

In the evening, I spent a good hour with Laura on the phone. She is tying up loose ends with her former employer and getting her resume in shape. She sounded pretty good on the phone and yet I could still hear the pain. Not so much for losing her job but more about the effort finding a new one will be. A career search is a full-time, plus overtime, job. The thought of it never goes away. Weekends are just short work weeks. There are no breaks from the career search and networking. Speaking of networks, a big “Thank you,” to Josh and Pete from my CCN group (and any of you who have contacted her directly) for reaching out to Laura with job opportunities and including her in your own network. She is very appreciative of your kindness. I can’t believe what great people I’ve met during this time and I am so very glad that you’re part of my new life.

Ack! Lose 20 pounds! That’s what Bruno's vet said yesterday. His back issues are because we’ve (no, me’ve) let him gain 20 pounds since we adopted him two years ago. Sigh. OK, I can do this diet with him. I’ve needed an extra kick in the butt and now I have it. Poor poochie. Wait. That’s the kind of thinking that got me…us…into this condition. No more! Foodies unite...lose the weight! This morning, Mr. B and I took an extra long (60 minute) walk. Well, it was actually a saunter. Didn’t burn any calories but we were upright and moving. All good!

It’s Thanksgiving Day and I made it through the Macy’s parade to the Smurfs. At that point, I knew Santa was only 30 minute away and the tears started. What is wrong with me? Bill says nothing; that it’s because I’m such a sentimentalist. True. Still, why do I cry? Thanksgiving holds such wonderful memories. My parents traded hosting the event with my father’s sister and her family. They lived in Green Bay just houses away from Bart Starr. Yes, as kids in the 70s we would walk down the street on turkey day to see if Bart was home. That is, of course, if the Packers weren’t playing. We always hoped we’d get the chance to chat with “the man.” Sometimes we did. Sometimes we spoke with Cherry, his wife. Memories.

I have much to be thankful for. My health. My marriage. My mother’s and mother-in-law’s health. My husband’s nephew arriving home from Germany today (in the military)! A roof over our heads. The unconditional love of Bruno and Lily. The warmth of natural gas. The electricity for my laptop. The get-up-and-go of my car. The clothes on my back (and front, thank you very much). The hugs I receive on a daily basis from friends. The realization that this will end in its own time, not mine. The change of seasons. The smell of dinner in the oven. The sound of the Packers winning (3rd quarter). The contentment of life and being alive. The friendship of new friends. The support from old friends. The knowing that I am a good person with good intentions and without my own personal agenda. The looking forward to Christmas because now that Thanksgiving had actually happened, the Father Christmas suit and bells need polishing and preparing for our first event. We’re ready…I think.

Happy Thanksgiving. Be happy in who you are, today. It can be, and should be, your foundation for tomorrow.

Now I really don’t know my dog. The last several days he slept in until 6:50am. No whining in the middle of the night to get up to piddle, no 5am whining to get on with our walk. Those of you who have or have had children tell me you’ve been there, done that. I don't have any children. I have a dog. When we brought Bruno home, I told Doc to treat him like a three- or four-year old. Basset hounds throw tantrums, whine and complain, talk back, and hold their ground just like a toddler. Tantrums are pretty funny. But lately, he’s subdued and he’s had difficulty with steps and furniture – yes, I allow my pets on the sofa. I don’t know what’s wrong and I’m trying not to worry. We’re going to the vet on Wednesday (regular maintenance of glands and nails) so we’ll get him all checked out. I want to do the best for the pets I’ve committed to bringing into my family but now cost becomes a bigger factor than ever. It’s hard not to feel guilty asking how much health care of an animal is in order to make a decision of what to do next.

Last week my husband found the article below. It encapsulated some of what I and others have experienced. Not sure if I agree with the 13 interviews statement, unless he was counting each person in a panel who may have interviewed him as separate interviews. That would bring one of my interview counts to nine on one day at one company – three panels of three.

A long wait for job offers
Friday, November 13, 2009
The Week magazine
With an average of six job seekers now competing for every opening, employers have the luxury of putting candidates through the wringer, said Diane Stafford in The Kansas City Star. “And, boy, is that frustrating the applicants,” who at every turn are subjected to blood tests, drug tests, and personality tests—often in vain. Gordon Bonnes, who works in the apparel industry, recently endured a drawn-out job search only to narrowly miss getting the position. He says you can’t blame a company for trying to find the right fit. “But 13 interviews may have been overboard.”

The best way to get past those barriers may be to find a back door, said Phyllis Korkki in The New York Times. “A lot of people don’t like to hear it, but it comes down to networking.” If you don’t have any connection to the company, there’s a good chance that you’ll jump through a lot of hoops for nothing. If you know someone on the inside, however, hiring managers may be willing to cut you a little slack—provided, of course, you can convey “what a witty, personable, flexible, cooperative, and hardworking employee you will be.”

It’s hard to keep feelings, specifically frustration, at bay during the hiring process when the competition is so intense and so well qualified. I just want to know where I stand so I can concentrate my energies on opportunities that are really interested in me and it’s up to me to ace it or blow it. When I was a hiring manager, I tried to push things along if not only to satisfy my own needs but to be sensitive to the people waiting for me to make a decision. This article has a cynical tone to it. I choose to think that most HR and hiring managers are conducting their process with more sensitivity and prudence than this implies. Even after 14 months.

We no longer need your services.

Bruno has had a tough week. It started with pain in his back that prevented him from doing even one step. He could walk just fine but going up steps was next to impossible. The strange part was that he could go down them. Doing his business outside presented a problem at 2am one night. He just couldn’t manage the two small steps. I had to put my coat on over my PJs and find something in the garage that would make a ramp. It took 30 minutes to get him inside and he was exhausted. So was I. But today he’s back to himself and we took a long walk on River Drive. It’s a great little neighborhood and he loves all the different smells. Right now Bruno is having his after breakfast nap on the couch.

Thursday night I received a call from a dear friend who had just been fired. “We no longer need your services,” they told her. There had been a few bumps in the road but from my perspective, nothing that would cause the organization to ask her to resign and when she refused, fire her. That’s from my perspective. I’m not sure anyone shares all the gory details about work even with close friends. It just isn’t done.

Laura cried. My heart sank because I knew very well what she was feeling and what she was going to feel over the course of this. It was why she called me and not her parents first. She was driving home and I asked her if she felt OK to drive; she could call me after getting out of her car. She said that she was OK. I knew she wasn’t but I didn’t want to abandon her. I asked Laura if she had all of the physical pain, too. She did. It's like that first puppy-love break up. It feels like your stomach being tied into a knot. And if you touch your skin, it feels like it has been burned and blistered. Every nerve is standing straight up and it’s strange that even the lightest touch is so very painful. The intense skin and muscle pain only lasts a few hours at most but it can return when you get into the deep sadness, almost depressive stage. The first stage, shock or disbelief, affects your emotions and physical being equally. Once she had gotten the whole story out, she was ready to get off the phone with me and call mom and dad. I was the rehearsal.

I chatted online with Laura early yesterday morning and she had gotten to the numb stage overnight. That’s good. It meant that she wouldn’t be in the grieving stage very long. She had already made plans to move out of her apartment and go back home. Her parents were being very supportive. This was Laura’s first real job out of college and her concern was her pride. She hates the idea of going back home and taking a temp job that her mom could get for her. Laura had had a temp position at her mom’s employer before taking this now defunct opportunity. It helped her pay for college and her master’s degree. I reminded her that they loved her there and she needed to feel wanted and appreciated and to be working. Being part of a contributing community is the one thing you miss most when you’re unemployed. She’s going to think about it.

I got the call from Laura’s firing squad last night. Laura had asked Doc and I to appear as Father Christmas and Mrs. Claus. Now that Laura was no longer with them, I was told, “We no longer need your services.” It was a relatively short conversation but I kept it professional and asked what publicity had been done. None, really, I was told. I explained my concern that their decision to pull the cord would look like our failure to show up. I was assured that that would not happen.

And so, Father Christmas and his wife will appear in Appleton at the Thompson Center’s Breakfast with Santa on December 5th. Hundreds of children and their families get the opportunity to meet with Santa in a private room away from the screams and squeals that the excitement of seeing Santa creates. It lifts my spirit and gives me hope for our future just thinking about it. It’s our fourth year and we wouldn’t miss it for the world. Our services are needed here.

Follow up and wait

Our walk Friday morning was a memorable one. I had an in-person interview and needed to get my day going early. We trotted down Verbrick to Adams and turned left. As we did, I looked to the sky to witness something I’d never considered before. In the East, the rose, and scarlet, and oranges painted the sky. In the West, I discovered the lavender, and blue, and turquoise slipping away and it looked just like “the blue hour.” At the end of each day, Doc calls that last bit of light before darkness takes hold the blue hour. He says that the blue hour chases the sun to its next destination. But now it was the sun chasing this blue hour. Almost as if the day was reversing itself. I thought about that for quite a while.

The interview that day went very well for me. I really enjoyed learning about the details that you only get in an interview and meeting the team I would work with via video conference. I’ve conducted video conferences in a sales setting but not in an interview so this wasn’t unnerving. That was good. I remember my first video conference. I was so nervous and the technology was new. I wasn’t confident then, but I was on Friday. I felt so relaxed and it felt good. My answers flowed and, again, it felt good. I’m so ready to get back into the workplace, I can taste it! I miss the dynamics of being on a team, being accountable to someone other than myself and my husband, and being a contributor. But, I was the first one to interview, there are nine more and I won’t know anything more until closer to Thanksgiving. Time to follow up and wait.

Saturday I worked on Mrs. Claus’ new bodice. Doc and I play Santa and Mrs. Claus, respectively, for several children’s events. Our interpretation is 19th century so it’s really Father Christmas and his wife. To get into the mood to sew dark green velvet, I warmed a Yankee Candle tart called “Christmas Eve.” It has a lovely spicy scent with notes of evergreen. At a certain point, I needed Doc’s opinion about the trim I would use so I called him into the room. We narrowed the plethora of choice down to something manageable and off he went. The next thing I knew, Doc was in the attic getting out the Christmas cards and his notes from last year’s holiday. An hour later he was near manic when I asked what the rush was on Christmas details. I mean, Thanksgiving is still 10 days away. And that’s when it hit me….the tart! Anyone in marketing and advertising knows the power of stimulating the senses and the sense of smell is one of the most influential. I warmed the tart to put me in the mood and didn’t think about what it would do to him. It sure did a number on him and we had a good laugh over it.

Today I had another in-person interview. Again, I feel really good about how it went. Like the interview on Friday, this is a new position and it’s important for the company to get the right person in place. As I look back at my past employment, there’s only one that wasn’t a new or dramatically changed position. I seem to gravitate to new opportunities. I’ll have to think about that. If you’re wondering which one I would take if I were offered both (several people have asked), I say, “How fortunate to have that dilemma.” So while I wait, in my follow up I’ll create the case for both of these employers to see me as the perfect fit and at the same time, continue the search, and do my homework.